A Holiday Wish For You

A Holiday Wish For You

Ned shares holiday greetings with our listeners.

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Dr. Hallowell’s new book, ADHD 2.0, comes out January 12th. Pre-order Now!  Click here to pre-order your copy of ADHD 2.0.

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Distraction is created by Sounds Great Media. Our producer is Sarah Guertin and our recording engineer/editor is Scott Persson.

Check out this episode!

A transcript of this episode is below.


Dr. Ned Hallowell:
This episode is sponsored by OmegaBrite Wellness. Get a free bottle of OmegaBrite CBD Full Spectrum Soft Gels with free shipping when you buy one bottle of their 70/10 MD Omega-3. Use offer code Ned. That’s my name, Ned. At OmegaBriteWellness.com. Distraction is also sponsored by Landmark College in Putney, Vermont. The college of choice for students who learn differently. Learn more at lcdistraction.org.

Dr. Ned Hallowell:
Hello, this is Dr. Ned Hallowell for our podcast called Distraction. I hope wherever you are, you’re healthy. I hope you have found shelter from the storm of the pandemic. And I hope your family, whatever holiday you celebrate, is together and enjoying one another. We happen to be Christian, we Hallowells, so we celebrate Christmas. Then there are the other holidays this season. There’s Hanukkah, there’s any number of other reasons to celebrate. And I think we all celebrate the new year in one way or another.

Dr. Ned Hallowell:
But I thought I’d talk today, in this holiday message, about what to do if you’re not as happy as you wish you were. I think a lot of folks this year have suffered. Not, “I think,” I know. A great deal more than the average year. Due to the pandemic and other factors, I think there’s a lot of not abject misery, but some abject misery, but more just a feeling of, “Gosh, I hope 2021 is better,” kind of thing. Not as happy as you wish you were. And there’s lots of remedies that people like me and people who write books and people who do podcasts… We’ve got lots of remedies for what to do if you’re not as happy as you wish you were.

Dr. Ned Hallowell:
But I thought I might take a different approach. Often when we’re not as happy as we wish we were, we’re waiting for something to happen to make it better. And then the usual advice from folks like me is, “Well, you’ve got to make your own music. Do something to make it happen.” I always say connect, and other people have their favorite remedies, but it’s all a matter of your finding the inner resource, the motivation to do something, to become as happy as you’d like to be, or as fulfilled as you’d like to be. Fill in whatever adjective you want to use. But there’s another approach that I might recommend to you. And it’s just to let it be. To let what I call the Holy Spirit, the messenger of God… And I’m not getting all religious on you, but that’s just my word for it.

Dr. Ned Hallowell:
Other people call it, “The magic,” or other people call it, I don’t know, whatever word you have for whatever spirit roams the universe. And I’ve found, if you just let it find you, all you need to do is sort of open yourself up to it. “When the sense of sacred presence fires,” wrote Samuel Johnson in one of his great poems, that comes, that sense of sacred presence. And said, doesn’t mean God. Don’t be put off if you’re an atheist, it applies to atheists just as much as to anyone else. It doesn’t require faith. It’s more a preparedness, a openness, saying, “Okay, universe, cosmos, world, life, I’m just going to let you swim through me.” And see what happens. See what happens. Very often you’ll find yourself, magically, miraculously, whatever adverb you want to put in there, feeling better for no good reason whatsoever.

Dr. Ned Hallowell:
It’s not that you just won the lottery. It’s not that you just had a business project succeed. It’s not that your children suddenly did everything you wanted them to. It’s none of that. It’s just a quiet but profound spirit, that’s my word for it, flows through you almost like a magic wind. Breathe in, breathe out. And if you just let it happen, if you just allow the forces in the universe that are there to help you, if you allow them to help you, and if you put down your sense of agency, your sense of not responsibility, but a feeling of, “Well, I got to do it for myself because no one else is going to do it for me.” Which is a fine attitude to have in some instances. But in the instance I’m recommending to you, it’s not that at all.

Dr. Ned Hallowell:
It’s just, you accept how you feel now, and then you wait, you watch, you see what you can see and you feel what you can feel. The image that comes to my mind, and this is something I do if not every day, at least every other day, is I lie on our bed. We have a big, huge bed. And our big, huge, 110 pound mutt named Max, part German shepherd, part boxer, part pit bull, but he’s got the short brown hair coloring of a boxer. He’ll bound up onto our bed, 110 pounds, and he just takes it in a single leap. And he will lie down there, stretched out, and he’ll look at me and I’ll be lying with my head propped up. And he’ll look at me with these big brown eyes and I’ll look at him and our eyes will lock. And all I see in his eyes is tranquility, is, “I’m here. Life is happening. You’re going to feed me in a little while, I’m sure. I’ve been outside. Don’t need to go outside. I just need to lie here. Look at you. You look at me.”

Dr. Ned Hallowell:
And we do that. We do that. We look at each other. And I know he enjoys it, because I enjoy it. And he stays there. Obviously, no words are exchanged, but feelings move back between us. Feelings move back and forth between us. And we both feel, the word that comes to my mind is contentment. We both feel contented. For the moment, we’re enough for each other. And I guess that’s my holiday wish for you all, to have a moment with yourself or with your dog or with a friend or with a piece of music or the beautiful mountainous vista or with the sea crashing the waves in your ears. Whatever the setting might be, I hope for you all, you’ll find a few moments where whatever it is that you find is enough. Enough to feel that quiet but sustaining sense of contentment.

Dr. Ned Hallowell:
Well, with that image of my dear friend Max and me lying on a bed, I’ll leave you until the holiday season has come and gone and we’re about to celebrate the new year. I wish you, whatever holiday you celebrate, I wish that it will be enough for you. And whatever feeling of not being as happy as you wish you were, I hope you fuel off of that as you move on to a newer, and we all hope, better place.

Dr. Ned Hallowell:
Was that our dog barking in the background? How appropriate. Yep, there’s the sound of the angel. All right, well, that’s it for me and from me for today. Thanks to our sponsor OmegaBrite Wellness. Get a free bottle of OmegaBrite CBD Full Spectrum Soft Gels with free shipping when you buy one bottle of their 70/10 MD Omega-3. Use offer code Ned at OmegaBriteWellness.com. And I’m thrilled, I am so relieved as well to tell you that my new book ADHD 2.0 is coming out on January 12th. Co-written with my buddy, Dr. John Ratey. We lay out a new approach, a revolutionary new approach, not really creating a revolution, but it is new and different. Featuring new science and strategies to help people with ADHD/ADD thrive. You can learn more about it, and I wish you would, about ADHD 2.0 and pre-order a copy, that would be wonderful, by clicking the link in the show notes or going to my website at drhallowell.com. Or of course, going to Amazon.

Dr. Ned Hallowell:
Okay, please reach out to us after you go pre-order a copy of ADHD 2.0. Reach out to us with your questions, comments, and whatever else you’d like to send us, an apple pie or a cheesecake. Well, that’d be hard to do by email. By emailing [email protected] That’s [email protected] And that faint, faint, faint chime you hear is my ring tone, which is a little bit of Bach. It doesn’t pollute any airway. So please reach out to us as I said, at [email protected]

Dr. Ned Hallowell:
Distraction is created by Sounds Great Media. Our recording engineer and editor the brilliant Scott Persson. And our producer is the always wonderful Sarah Guertin. This is Dr. Ned Hallowell, wishing you all a very wonderful, wonderful holiday season. Goodbye for now.

Dr. Ned Hallowell:
The episode you just heard, just now heard, was made possible by my good friends at OmegaBrite Wellness. Get a free bottle of OmegaBrite CBD Full Spectrum Soft Gels with free shipping when you buy one bottle of their 70/10 MD Omega-3. Use offer code Ned, that’s my name, at OmegaBriteWellness.com.

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